Thursday, May 1, 2008

why, why, why?!

some people think i'm full negativity, latent hostility and have a bit of a superiority complex, and perhaps they are right... or as jake gyllenhaal said in the good girl, they just don't get me!

altho i get my feelings hurt way too eaily and lash out, i generally forgive easily--usually in 30 seconds, and once i love you, i'll love you forever and do whatever i can do to make you happy. of course, there are those who have pissed me off again and again; and i forgive them, but i'm not inviting them to my bar-b-que...

where am i going with this... oh, yeah, all morning i've been fuming over the snow. i know we're not the only ones dealing with the snow today, because bret sanders just mentioned that he's seeing the snow outside his window over mike's camera. but i guess, i hoped that may would be the start of spring. since we're in the throes of soccer and baseball and it's spring for God's sake!

oh yeah... soccer... last night as we stood in the snow--yep, that's what kind of great mom i am--watching these 8-9-10 year olds play soccer, the fun vanished from the game and all of the sudden we were in the midst of a racially fueled pissing match! let me say, that we obviously aren't any better than anyone else, because we have three excellent players on our team who we've nicknamed the "brazilian national team" because... well... because they are hispanic and are just truly amazing to watch play the game.

so here we are in the last quarter of the game, and there's a question over a goal attempt. two or three plays later, this kid on the other team is holding his face and sobbing like a little girl instead of playing defense. his parents run out there, and rescue their kid. it's bizarre... all of the soccer-moms start the murmuring, what's going on-what happened-is he okay-is dave going to call the game yet... oh, wait, that was just my thought.

so this is how it went down... a kid on the other team disagreed with the ref's call, our team backed up the call, the kid then said to one of the three, "you don't know anything, you stupid mexican," our kid retaliated, and the name caller started to cry. this is what i find to be the most interesting and distrubing:
  • where would a kid pick up such a statement--parents maybe?

  • the kid's easy ability to throw such racial slurs--and not expect retaliation

  • the fact that our boy did that shoulder-to-shoulder shove during normal play of the game--no punching in the face was involved

  • not only did the kid hurt our player's feelings, but then he lied to make himself look good

  • our player offered no apology, just looked up at his dad with tears glistening in his eyes and said, in english, "but, papi, he called me a stupid mexican." and his dad hugged him, smiled and continued to pass put snacks.

who's to blame? i just don't know, but i can tell you i gave jackson and ryan the what-for over this. we talked about the ignorance of people who call names, and who might not tell whole truths. and after my tirade, ryan says to me as he pensively stares out the window, "why does this have to happen at every game? last week some kid said the same thing... so, can i have 2 or 3 scoops of ice cream at baskin robbins?"

it scares me that we let our boys walk around with these ideas floating around freely. and i'm not naive--i know this isn't a new thing or that i can protect them from it, but it still has got me in a funk. i hurt for that boy and for the other two who also feel the sting of the name-calling. i have my opinions about immigration, but i have no idea what it's like to be in crystal "clean" idaho as a different nationality. i do know what it's like to hold your child when they have been crushed by someone's need to make your child feel small. your heart aches for that little bit of childhood that has been ripped from them, and celebrate that (hopefully) they'll remember how much they hurt and will think twice before hurting someone else.

i hope that dave and i are raising jackson and ryan to be open-minded enough to appreciate everyone as God's creation. and then again speaking of God's creation...

... is spring ever going to come?

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